Taking the Fall

Someone has to.

Army Pfc. Lynndie England, whose smiling poses in photos of detainee abuse at Abu Ghraib made her the face of the scandal, was convicted Monday by a military jury on all but one of the seven counts she faced. England, 22, was found guilty of one count of conspiracy, four counts of maltreating detainees and one count of committing an indecent act. She was acquitted on a second conspiracy count. The jury of five male officers needed slightly more than two hours to reach its verdict. Her case now moves into the sentencing phase, which will determined by the same jury of five Army officers. She faces a maximum 10 years in prison.

On the bright side, she’ll still get her three hots and a cot, so it ain’t all that bad. And when she gets out she can look forward to the obligatory book deal, the appearance on the Tyra Banks Show…oh, wait a minute — that only has another couple of months on air before someone at the network sobers up and kills the thing. Alright, scratch the talk show.

With any luck she’ll be able to book a slot on The Howard Stern Show and plug a website containing “unauthorized” Abu Ghraib photos along with a few playful beach snapshots.

Uh, well maybe we’ll scratch the beach shots too.

UPDATE: 3 years in prison

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